About my absence...

***THIS IS A PRIVATE POST, ONLY PEOPLE I HAVE GIVEN THIS LINK TO ARE THE ONES I WANT READING IT. IF ANY OF YOU SHARE IT PUBLICLY, I WILL KILL YOU!***


First of all, let me thank all of you who contacted me through various means to check on my well being. It feels good to know that I have people that care about me, even if I have met you in person or not. On a side note, some of your sleuthing skills are scary as shit. I'm pretty sure some of you have my DNA profile, blood type, medical history, and pant size somewhere on your computers.

Now. The reason for my absence. The short story: I deactivated my Facebook account because there were people attacking me. Rather than buy into it, ruin my reputation, and waste my time, I took the path of least resistance. I took a self-imposed hiatus. And it was the best thing I could have done.

The long story:

As many of you know, my wife and I are in the process of getting divorced. We had decided sometime in November that in order for us to be the best parents for our children, we would rather be happy apart than miserable together. In the past 3 years since my heart attack, I have changed. Apparently, according to my physicians and psychiatrists, it's normal for someone's personality to change drastically after a major health event.

I changed in the way that what I wanted was now more important than pacifying my relationship. I wanted to do things to make myself happy. Before my heart attack, working, drinking, and random other poor life choices made me happy. After, video games, movies, TV shows, Facebook, and socializing with all of you makes me happy. Unfortunately, my ex and I didn't agree on what constitutes me being happy.

We decided that I would move out of our house and in with my friend on December 26th. We thought that the kids would take it easier if it were right after Christmas because they would still be focused on gifts, sleepovers, and other things that would somewhat lessen the blow.

Now. In order for the story to continue, I have to go to the past.

My brother in law moved to California to marry my ex's sister over 10 years ago. Among other things we did as a family was introduce each other to friends. He had a female friend at the wedding that was still living in New York, and brought her boyfriend of (eventually) more than 5 years to the wedding.

Meet Lexi.

Forward to about 7 years ago. My sister in law had a little boy. Being Catholic, she was tasked with selecting Godparents for this child. I was chosen as the Godfather, and the Lexi was chosen as the Godmother.

Around 5 years ago, she came out to Arizona with her new boyfriend. It happened to be around my birthday, so we went out for a bunch of drinks, and I made an ass of myself. I challenged some guy to a drunken danceoff, and ended up vomiting through my hands onto people in line waiting to get into the bar we were at, from that moment on known as "The Sprinkler Incident". Lexi's boyfriend insisted on feeding me Patron shots all night, and to this day, that is the drunkest I have ever been.

In the 10 years that I had known Lexi, these were about the only times we ever spoke to one another. A random comment on Facebook, few and far between, were exceptions.

So. Back to Christmas Day. My brother in law had gotten his kids a new video game system, and a dancing game. Our Godson was getting into it, and being cute, so I recorded it.

I then asked my sister in law for Lexi's number, so that I could send it to her. After I sent it to her, she texted back. We began friendly talk, and I told her about my ex and I. Then she told me that her relationship wasn't doing well either.

After a few weeks, I decided that since I had never seen NYC, and I now had a personal tour guide, that I would fly out and spend a couple weeks there. During this time, Lexi and her boyfriend split. Our friendship evolved into something more. I spoke to my ex about it, and she was surprisingly supportive.

The day finally came. I flew to NYC, met up with Lexi, and we headed off to the city. Then the trouble started. My ex had a breakdown, and began posting things on Facebook, making calls to Lexi's ex, telling everyone she could about how much of a piece of shit I was. If it was just her, it wouldn't have been so bad, but some other members of her family got involved, and began posting things also, not only to my wall, but to Lexi's as well. I also received a scathing email from my family members as well. This is why I deactivated my account.

The two weeks I spent in NYC were the most amazing two weeks of my life. The city is great, the people are great, and the food is phenomenal. I think I gained 15 lbs. just from those two weeks. And, I met the woman I am supposed to be with.

My ex has since apologized, and things are better, but I am still furiously happy to be with Lexi.

And I'm furiously happy that all of you care enough about me to check in, and want to hear my story.

She makes me happy.

You all make me happy.

Thank you all.